I love my husband, like super big time a lot, but I really hate really sappy “I love you” holiday cards. I mean I feel all those lovely sentimental things, but most of the time he just likes when I goose his tushie and tell him I like his butt. These cards are for people like us.
A couple months ago I did a Beautiful Blogger feature on Sarah of The Laughing Medusa. I found her blog by accident one day and have been an avid reader ever since. Not only is she currently spending a year in London, she is also using this life experience to really work on her relationship with herself and making the most of what life has to offer: a lesson I’ve been working on ever since losing my brother earlier this year. Her recent post 50 Simple Steps to Cultivate Self Love really resonated with me; it is a list of ways to bring a little bit of happy into your daily life. Happy every day: sounds amazing, right? I have my favorite 11 ideas from post listed below, but you should click over to her blog to read the whole list and find a couple to incorporate into your own life. You’ll be surprised how easy it is to brighten your own day.
Purge your wardrobe of anything that doesn’t fit or make you feel fabulous. Wear a piece of jewelry or any totem that reminds you of your commitment to self-love. Stop hanging out with anyone who doesn’t lift you up. Schedule in weekly pampering time. Choose a personal anthem that pumps you up. Set goals. Review them regularly. Let go of those that aren’t lighting you up and plan action steps to attain the ones that make your heart sing. Buy yourself flowers. When opportunity knocks, say yes. Even if it scares you. Buy bright lipstick. Get a tattoo. Wear a motorcycle jacket. Find that little extra oomph that helps you feel like a badass. Get really dressed up a few times a week. Give genuine compliments daily. Praising someone takes us out of the mindset of comparing ourselves to them. And you’ll feel good when you see their face light up.
When I was younger I thought that love had to be this grand story frought with passion and angst. Where grand gestures and elaborate gifts were the status quo, and being in “true love” meant overcoming insurmountable odds. It made for some interesting relationship moments early on. Now that I am older and, I would hope, a little wiser, I’ve come to realize that while that kind of thing can be very dramatic and wonderful occasionally…it doesn’t really work in the long term. Frankly, I feel like Andy and I have dealt with enough major life events in the last two years to last us another five. Real love, in my opinion, is waking up next to one another every day and knowing, without a doubt, that they have your back. I’ve also discovered that, although roses can be a great way to show you care, it’s the small things that mean the most. Things like:
Ordering Chinese food three nights in a row because that is all your spouse wants to eat
Giving your husband head scratches for two and a half hours because he had a bad day at work and video games and snicker doodles just aren’t enough to fix it.
Holding the bucket while your wife throws up because she is too sick to make it to the bathroom, then washing the bucket so it will be clean in case there is a round two.
Bringing the trash bins up from the curb.
Loading/Unloading the dishwasher….actually doing any dish washing related chore.
Cooking meat for your non-vegetarian husband because he doesn’t mind eating vegetarian most of the time for you.
Reading a book in the living room while your spouse plays video games, even if the idea of them stomping space zombies for extra coins makes you feel a little queasy.
Letting your spouse warm their icy toes against the back of your leg.
Taking the first shower so your partner can sleep for an extra 15 minutes.
Cleaning the litter box.
Those are just some examples from the Bucior household. Don’t get me wrong, candy and flowers are still nice to get on occasion, but Andy and I both HATE dish duty more than almost any other chore, so it is a really big deal to come home and find the sink empty. I’d take a pass on washing the dishes over a dozen roses any day. Just saying.
The best job I ever had was working for the “lost books” department at the Strozier Library at FSU. The pay was crap and due to numerous budget cuts by the university, my hours had been cut in half (ultimately why I had to leave), but I loved it. Basically, my job was to do a final shelf search and make sure that the books that were listed as overdue or lost were in fact overdue or lost and not just incorrectly logged in. Not the most glamorous job, but I got to spend hours wondering through the stacks surrounded by the smell of old books. Bonus, I also had an almost endless supply of reading material for my break time. I recently discovered a book called The Library: A World History,and man would I love to search for books in one of these places!
